Here are two snippets from my work life:
[people I work for]
Brian: how’s the boyfriend situation?
Me: Um, nonexistant?
Brian: What about at church?
Me: Everyone at my church is either already married with kids or in their mid to late twenties. Which isn’t old, but they think I’m too young or something.
Brian: but you’re twenty two.
Me: No, I’m twenty one. And the words twenty one scream “I just want to drink and party and get wasted all the time.”
Brian: Well that’s totally who you are. I mean, you go clubbing every weekend.
Me: Oh yeah! When you said about going clubbing tonight with Brandi, I was like: sign me up! I have my slutty clothes in the car!
Brian: You’ve got pimped out clothes in your car? Awesome!
Brandi: Oh yeah, let’s go clubbing, you in your slutty clothes and me with my pregnancy cellulite hanging out. We’ll be hot.
[people I work with]
Danielle: Why is everyone here married and having kids, or not married and still having kids?
Anna: I just got out of a long term relationship before I started working here.
Me: Really? Me too.
Danielle: Me too! It’s like a fresh start for all of us. We should go out tonight and celebrate and get wasted.
Yes ladies and gentlemen. My conversations at WF revolve around drinking, other people and their children, what it means to be religious and how many referrals we have to bankers. My conversations with Brandi and her husband Brian usually involve cars, the children, church stuff and cellulite. Welcome to my life. It’s awesome.