self discovery numero 3.
I am apparently a very stubborn person (sh! don’t tell my parents). Tonight, on the treadmill at Ghena’s I suddenly found myself unable to breathe. You may laugh and think I’m joking or making an unremarkable quip about the lack of oxygen in the mile high city. And while the latter may be true, the former certainly isn’t. I was on my third sprint, trucking along, thinking to myself: back straight, feet tight underneath, kicking back, look forward, look forward [oh but what joy to watch the speed of my feet!] look forward! elbows in, back straight dangit!”
When quite suddenly I found myself a little short of breath. And then, I couldn’t seem to get much air into my lungs at all. It was like an impasse had been masterfully constructed just below the bronchial tubes, blocking my lungs from recieving the air my nose and mouth so greedily stole from the basement. I watched that dial click around the corner of the “track” on the treadmill and hoped the feeling would go away. But it didn’t.
Craaaaaap. I didn’t take my inhaler.
But you know, I glanced to my right, and watched a motion picture reflected in the water heater. My shadow was dancing, up and down; my pony tail swished side to side and my heels flicked up towards my rear with beautiful form. And I thought to myself:
Screw my exercise induced asthma.
Stop? Slow down? Go from 8 to 7?
No. In fact, we’re going to speed things up, run an extra sprint and slap another mile and a half onto the whole night’s run. Take that! See if I need my albuterol now! Becuase I’ll be damned if I’m going to give up now and limp off the treadmill to ice some narly shin splints and nurse a worn out knee. I’m taking off my shoes, I’m running farther and I’m running faster and I’m turning up my music. Someday, I”ll have hearing damage. But I’ll humbly buy myself some hearing aids and tell the grandkids of hte days when granny ran a 9.50 minute mile. Because I’m only young once but I’m old for a long time and then I go to Jesus who heals all things: from broken hearts to hearing loss from the incalculable damage I do every time I put those headphones on and spin the volume till the drums make my ears ring.
And most of all: I am not going to stop running.